Game 12: RSL vs. TST: Some Home (Depot) Improvement

Well, while RSL certainly made it much more adventurous than it needed to be, they did go on the road, to the place where RSL teams go to die, and pulled out a 1-0 victory. The win at Chivas TST was RSL's first road win on the season and will hopefully start the team down the right path for the rest of the year.

First Half Grade: B
No, it wasn't pretty, but RSL played TST even (if not a little better) for most of the half. Neither team looked real sharp, but for a team that has struggled as much as they have on the road, especially in the Home Depot Center, RSL looked pretty good. While both teams struggled to create any definitive chances, it was RSL who was able to bust through. In the 34th minute, Kyle Beckerman played a nice ball forward from the midfield. Robbie Findley ran free and onto the ball, which drew TST keeper Dan Kennedy out of the goal. Robbie took the ball, ran past a chasing Klejstan, around a charging Kennedy, and buried the ball into the back of the net. 1-0 RSL. TST turned up the attack after the goal, forcing RSL into some pressure situations, but never really got anything on net. Halftime score: 1-0.

Second Half Grade: D
Wow. Not just ugly, but OOGLAY! Apparently Jason's speech at halftime was: OK, we got a goal, now everybody sit back in the final third and try to repress wave after wave of TST attack for 45 minutes. I hate this "Let's play not to lose" mentality, and it has cost RSL more times than I can count. In this game, it almost cost them again, as TST attacked again and again and again and again. Credit to Olave and Borchers who repelled TST over and over. Chivas TST's best chance probably came in the 53rd, when Utah native Justin Braun (who couldn't possibly have been onside, but I digress) ran free into the 18 and put a hard shot directly into the arms of Nick Rimando. Little Nicky did a good job cutting off the angle, but credit to Braun for making that one WAY too easy for Nick. Finally, around the 80-85th minute, RSL remembered they were allowed to hold possesion and even move forward in attack and easily killed the rest of the game. Despite facing a deluge of shots in the second half, with the help of some poor TST finishing, RSL was able to "Kansas City" their way to the shutout. Final score 1-0, RSL.

Pros:
-Findley scores again.
-The two center backs look very legit.
-Beckerman seems back to his old active, pestering self.
-Morales was all over.
-Justin Braun can't shoot.
-Rimando was solid.
-Tino Nunez looked pretty good.
-A WIN AT THE HOME DEPOT CENTER!!!

Cons:
-Cordoba looks lost out there.
-Second half tactics were, to be kind, atrocious.
-Another card for Olave. He's pulling a Mantilla 2007.

Game Grade: C
I can't really be too harsh, as RSL went on the road, where they are awful, to the HDC, where they are awful, and beat Chivas TST, which is always nice (suck it, Luis Bueno!). A very painful second half, but RSL showed some character in hanging on and earning the win. Now back home to face San Jose yet again, which will be tough. Can RSL beat them again for the 500th time in the last month or will the NTOTB finally have RSL's number?

Player Grades:
Nick Rimando-7 Solid when tested
Tony Beltran-7 Some iffy tackles but good
Nat Borchers-8 A brick wall in the back.
Jamison Olave-8 Big, enforcer style game; I love it!
Chris Wingert-6 Decent game, let "Whiny Sacha" get in his head a bit.
Dema Kovalenko-7 Much more of a factor than he had been recently.
Matias Cordoba-4 Did he play?
(Yura Movsisyan 62)-4 Mostly a non-factor, left injured after 25 min.
(Kenny Cutler 87)-6 Team seemed to settle when he came in.
Robbie Findley-7 Had a goal, and looked good even out of position in the 2nd.
Javier Morales-7 Pestered the goats all over the field.
Kyle Beckerman-7 Nice to see the old Kyle back.
Kenny Deuchar-6 Once again, hustled, but little else. Is he a bust?
(Tino Nunez 80)-7 Limited minutes, but pushed forward well.

RSL Man of the Match:
Jamison Olave - When Kreis decided he didn't want to win, but just "not to lose," it was Borchers and Olave who stepped it up. Both were great, but Jamison gets the nod for a couple well-timed, crucial tackles and clears, but mostly for the tough guy attitude that ran through his game all night long. Well done.

Assclown of the Match:
Jason Kreis - I wanted to give it to "Whiny Sacha" Klejstan for his incessant complaining (what is it about LA and whiny athletes/coaches? See: Kobe Bryant, Phil Jackson, the rest of the Lakers, Landon Donovan, etc. etc. etc.), but Jason won it with his tactical "brilliance." A not-even-totally-fit Yura Movsisyan at right mid? Robbie Findley seemingly playing left wing back? The complete bunker ball strategy employed the whole second half? As the kids say, "WTF?"

The Royal Rankings #8

After a week off from the rankings, I'm baaaaack. Last week was a bit crazy and the rankings reflect that. Here we go!

14 NTOTB - Seriously, if they get OUT of 14th, it will be huge.
13 Chivas TST - Lost to RSL in the Royal Burial Grounds (aka HDC).
12 Kansas City - Finally get a home game...and lose 3-0.
11 Energy Bovines - Shocked and awed in DC.
10 Cripids/Crapids - Playing poorly as of late.
09 REAL SALT LAKE - Finally get the elusive road win, in the most unlikely of places.
08 Dallass - Solid win over Chicago.
07 Creamsickles - Dominated by New England at home.
06 Ben Cup Losers - Finally rounding into form.
05 Toronto Streamer Warehouse - Very strong home win over the Crapids.
04 Chicago's BSOF - Coming down off the early season high.
03 LAG - Defense is holding enough to let the big O win games for them.
02 Columbus - Break the goal drought with a big 3-0 win in KC's homecoming.
01 NERds - VERY impressive in dismantling Houston in Texas.

Game of the week:
(#2) Columbus travels to California to take on the red hot (#3) Galaxy.

Ye Olde Royal Predictions: Week 13

Still working on getting through the TST game before tonight's game, but I wanted to get the predictions up on time this week for once.

Wednesday, June 18th:
Energy Bovines 0 vs. NERds 2
NTOTB 2 vs. REAL SALT LAKE 3

Thursday, June 19th:
Chicago's BSOF 2 vs. TST 1

Saturday, June 21st:
KC 1 vs. Streamer Warehouse 2
Dallass 1 vs. Energy Bovines 1
NERds 2 vs. REAL SALT LAKE 1
Creamsickles 2 vs. Crapids/Cripids 2
THE* 2 vs. LAG 3

Sunday, June 22nd:
NTOTB 1 vs. Ben Cup Losers 3

*THE is my newest reference for Columbus because of the stupid "THE Crew" in their logo. If it's on their logo, it's their name. Presenting the Columbus THE. (Yes, I'm reaching)

Last week's results:
A solid, plus-.500 week. And honestly, I hate to mark myself down for the RSL game, did ANYONE see that coming? Didn't think so.
4 right (0 exact), 3 wrong (57%)

Season Total:
36-48 [5 exact] (43%, 6%)

Game 11: KC vs. RSL Grades

I'm finally trying to get the Review back up-to-date so here's the grades for the 0-0 draw-that-feels-like-a-loss (DTFLAL) against Kansas City on June 7th.

1st Half Grade: B
2nd Half Grade: B
Both halves were very similar, with RSL dominating the possesion and attacking consistently. They also ended up with nothing to show on the scoreboard.

Game Grade: C+
How do two Bs make a C+? I'll tell you. If you thoroughly outplay your opponents and create as many chances as RSL did over 90 minutes and don't win, well, you don't deserve much more than a C+.

Player grades:
Nick Rimando-6 Got the clean sheet with no effort required
Tony Beltran-6 Very up and down game
Nat Borchers-7 KC didn't test him much, but when they did, they were denied.
Jamison Olave-6 Played well, but had a few too many mental mistakes.
Chris Wingert-6 Pretty quiet game for Chris.
Andy Williams-6 Involved but nothing special.
(Matias Cordoba 70)-5 I think I saw more of him when he was on the bench!
Dema Kovalenko-6 Decent game for Dema
Javier Morales-7 Really making himself the catalyst for this team.
Kyle Beckerman-7 2nd half was his best effort in a while.
Kenny Deuchar-4 Needs to finish some of these golden opportunities.
(Tino Nunez 76)-6 Didn't really get a lot of time
Robbie Findley-5 Finishing wasn't as egregious as Kenny's, but still awful.

RSL Man of the Match:
Javier Morales - Most of the good offensive opportunities for RSL were created by Javi. His confidence is visibly through the roof and it is paying dividends on the field.

Assclown of the Match:
Kevin Hartman - Dude played out of his mind and somehow pulled a clean sheet out of his behind. Couldn't you have just let one sneak by Kevin? Really? Way to harsh our buzz, man! (There weren't too many good candidates in this one, so I gave it to Hartman for single-handedly stealing the points from RSL).

Ye Olde Royal Predictions: Week 12: FM 2008 is the devil!

So I've gotten sucked back into Football Manager 2008 (well, Worldwide Soccer Manager, but it's the same thing) and, as a result, the Review is suffering. But, quickly, here are my week 12 predictions (as before, all predictions were made before this week's games-proven by my painfully wrong prediction on Thursday's game):

Thursday, June 12th:
NERds 1 vs. Creamsickles 1

Saturday, June 14th:
Crapids 1 vs. Streamer Warehouse 2
Energy Bovines 0 vs. Unitedwagen 2
THE Crew (seriously, does their logo need the word 'The'?) 1 vs. Wiz 2
LAG 3 vs. NTOTB 1
REAL SALT LAKE 0 vs. TST 3

Sunday, June 15th:
Blanco School of Flopping (BSOF) 1 vs. Dallass 2

I hate to make that prediction for RSL, but they are headed to the HDC this weekend. Also known as the 'Royal Burial Grounds'. But trust me, I would like nothing more than a big RSL win over tst. GO RSL!

Last week's results:
BIG week for me! It's about time!
5 correct (1 exact), 2 wrong (71%)

Season Total:
32-45 [5 exact] (42%, 6%)

And, oh yes, never fear RSL fans! If my game is correct (and we can all hope that it is), RSL WILL win the MLS Cup this year. Of course, they also should have won the Open Cup this year for that logic to work, but we can conveniently forget that part, right?

News and Notes, Thoughts and Opinions

First off, thanks to all who voted in the Royal Review Color poll, the current RSL scheme has won out. However, the black and white scheme did pull enough votes for me to look into viable options for those people. If I get time to try a few things, I will let you know. As for now, enjoy the colors of the homeland! :)

In place of the old color scheme poll I have added a new one. In your eyes, who is RSL's player of the year so far? I took the top 6 (it would have been 5, but two players were tied for 5th) players in my season long player grades and put them on there. I'm just curious to see what the rest of RSL-land (and MLS-land) thinks.

As everyone knows by now, Real Madrid cancelled its 2008 exhibition with RSL, hopefully to the surprise of no one. The "partnership" between the teams has always been shaky at best. The Madrid sponsored youth academy? No where to be found. The loaning of promising young stars? Hasn't happened. The biannual (every two years) friendly in Salt Lake? Well, we got 1 (out of five). So basically, this partnership that was supposed to be so fruitful for RSL has ended with RSL getting 1 friendly, 1 preseason training at Madrid's facilities, and the shaft. And worse yet, RSL doesn't seem upset about it. In the linked article, Lagerwey even admits he doesn't know if RSL will be compensated for the missed friendly. You know, the one specified by a legally binding contract. RSL front office: Grow a pair. Stand up to someone besides your own fans. China's national team doesn't pay your bills. Neither does RM. The fans do. Fight for them (not against them) and for yourselves once in a while, damn.

There's a decent article in the SL Tribune today about Nate Sturgis. It basically reiterates what I said months and months ago, this kid is ALWAYS injured. He is RSL's Mark Prior. I feel bad for him, especially after the article pointed out something I hadn't thought of: if his injury doesn't heal up soon, he won't be fit enough to play in the Olympics. That would be a heartbreaker. For Nathan's sake, I hope he heals up soon and gets to go to Beijing. I mean, seriously, who doesn't dream of being in the Olympics?

Finally, to the Fox Soccer Channel: Please hire me as Max Bretos's pronunciation guide. His mangling of the names of players and places has gotten to be too much. And even better, I come cheap (just ask my current employer!). Yours, Ben.

The Royal Rankings #7

14 NTOTB - A decent expansion team, but an expansion team nevertheless.
13 Unitedwagen - When will this team show up?
12 REAL SALT LAKE - Big win, but need to do it away from the U.
11 Dallas - RSL has got to still be kicking themselves over that one.
10 Kansas City - Last 4 league games: loss, loss, tie, loss.
09 Energy Drinks - Altidore on the move
08 Houston - Playing much better after a slow start.
07 Chivas TST - Big win over the Niña, Pinta, and Santa Maria.
06 LAG - Pretty weak without Beckham and Donovan.
05 Columbus - Zero goals in their last three league games. Ouch.
04 Crapids/Cripids - Still on top in the West.
03 Toronto Streamer Warehouse - Nice to see Cunningham on the score sheet.
02 NERds - On top by 1 pt. the East, but Chicago has 2 games in hand and a whopping +11 advantage in goal diff.
01 Ow! The Fire! It burns! - Cuauhtemoc Louganis and friends keep on rollin'.