Do You Believe In Miracles? YES! Pt. 2

OK, so maybe it's not a bunch of college kids defeating the Soviet wrecking crew in hockey, but it was still a HUGE win, especially for a team that has struggled so mightily on the road. I'm still giddy about the game so not much for commentary, but I do want to mention what a big difference it makes when the midfield shows up (compare this game to game 1 and you'll see what I mean). Anyway, on to the grades!

Player Grades:
Nick Rimando-7 Possibly could have had the 1st goal, although not totally his fault. Otherwise stellar.
Robbie Russell-3 Only real weak link on the night. Really bad, 2nd goal is on him.
Chris Wingert-6 OK game for Chris. Still not on 2008 season form, but not bad.
Nat Borchers-7 Steady game for Nat.
Jamison Olave-7 Was it a penalty or no? Wasn't given so he stays at 7.
Andy Williams-8 Was an absolute animal in the first half. Really nice to see Andy score to lock it up after the year he's had!
(Jean Alexandre 91+)- Not on the field long enough to get a rating
Kyle Beckerman-7 Solid most of the night and, most importantly, didn't get a 2nd yellow so he's available for the conf. final.
Javier Morales-8 Finally looked like '08 Javi.
(Clint Mathis 82)-6 Not much of a chance to do a lot as the Crew were in desperation mode when he came on.
Will Johnson-7 As always, extremely active.
Robbie Findley-7 Was a little worried the pressure would get to him on the PK but he calmly put it away.
Fabian Espindola-7 Earned the PK that put RSL on top for good.
(Yura Movsisyan 65)-6 Solid, but like Mathis, got caught up in the Crew's desperate attacks.

Coach grade (Kreis)-7 Not sure how much was him and how much was the team just doing it themselves, but the squad kept motivated after going down 2-0, which is a complete unknown for an RSL team on the road.
Ref grade (Toledo)-4 As usual, a terrible game for Toledo. Missed some big calls for the Crew and called way too many fouls on RSL that he didn't call the other way.

RSL Man of the Match-Andy Williams
What can I say? The guy looked like a world beater for much of this one. The goal was just icing on the cake.

Assclown of the Match-Frankie Hejduk
Normally I'm a Hejduk guy, but his incessant whining brings his AOTM, just beating out teammate Alejandro Moreno who put on the biggest show of flopping this side of Blanco.

MLS Playoffs 2009: Game 1 vs. Columbus

First off, congrats to RSL for pulling off a near-miracle and making it to the playoffs. However, once you're there, can you do anything with it? The reds were out to do just that over the weekend.
It was a gorgeous Saturday afternoon, and with it being Halloween, there were plenty of costumes to gawk at. On a related topic, have you stopped at gawked at the total morons bemoaning the loss of freedom of religion to the left-wing gay conspiracy (led by President Obama, of course) just outside of the stadium? It is truly a testament to America's freedom of speech that such lunacy is allowed in public. But I digress. Back to the game. Realistically, RSL needed an effort much like the 4-1 shellacking they put on the Crew at the River earlier this season to give themselves the best chance to get to the Eastern Conference Final (note to MLS: fix the screwy playoff system. NOW!). Unfortunately, some extremely tenative and mediocre play through the midfield made this impossible, but after working out the jitters RSL was able to control the game for the most part. However, the mids weren't really able to work the balls up front in any sort of dangerous position for most of the game, limiting RSL's chances. And after Findley missed a shot into the side netting in the 83rd, I think most fans were thinking we were looking at a 0-0 tie on the day. And that's what made the goal in the 88th that much sweeter. Yura took a quick throw in from WillJ that broke him free from the defense and put a pin-point pass into the box that Robbie toed home for the game-winner. And the place went, for lack of a better term (cover your eyes, children) apeshit. It was a combo of being excited for the goal and just total relief that RSL had FINALLY broken the ice. So although it's not the multi-goal lead that I (and I'm sure RSL themselves) would have liked, it's at least a lead. Well done RSL, and good luck in Ohio. Bring home the Cup boys!

Player grades:
Nick Rimando-7 Not a lot to do
Chris Wingert-7 Steady
Nat Borchers-7 Solid as always in the back
Jamison Olave-7 Kept his head straight and had a nice game
Tony Beltran-7 Very active, looked good
(Robbie Russell 79)-6 Not a lot of time to put his mark on the match
Andy Williams-5 Like the rest of the midfield, too may turnovers
Kyle Beckerman-5 Meh
Javier Morales-3 Just awful. Passed consistently to CLB, no defense, no hustle.
(Clint Mathis 75)-6 Nothing special but anything was better than Javi Saturday
Will Johnson-6 Probably the best in midfield on a bad day for MFs
Robbie Findley-6 Scored a goal but was a bit rough most of the night
Fabian Espindola-5 Never really read any of Robbie's runs right
(Yura Movsisyan 65)-9 I'm a Yura-hater for the most part, but he was spectacular and RSL was a different team with him on the field Saturday.

Coach grade (Kreis)-8 Usually his subs are inexplicable to me, but these were good (recognizing that Javi was killing us was a good move) and his team pressed to get a W.
Ref grade (Geiger)-5 Inconsistent on calls as per usual in MLS.

RSL Man of the Match-Yura Movsisyan
Left Rio Tinto with a great performance that hopefully will get RSL one step closer to MLS Cup 09.

Assclown of the Match-Frankie Hejduk
Went in 2-footed on an RSL man (can't remember which off the top of my head) that I have often seen a red given for. Wasn't even given a card, so you'd think he'd be happy right? Oh no, he bitched for 10 minutes. Assclown.

Quote of the Day-"The Italian pedophile" in reference to Columbus's Gino Padula, who does, in fact, look like an Italian pedophile. Good job guys standing behind me in section 1!

2009 Game 24: RSL vs. Wizards: The Wiz Whizz On Their Chances

Wow. Been a long time since an update, I apologize. Work has been crazy lately, but hopefully life is getting back to normal. First, a quick shoutout to Clint Mathis for being overwhelmingly voted the Royal Review Readers' Player of the 1st Half of the Season. Well done! Anyway, I'm keeping this one short, both to ease my way back in and because I doubt anyone will even see this after such a long break! Here's the grades from RSL's gritty road win (with only 10 men for a majority of the match) over a KC squad that not only squandered numerous chances in front of goal, but also possibly its chances for a playoff berth.

Player grades:
Chris Seitz-9 Showed why he's been so highly regarded. Would've taken a world class strike to beat him.
Chris Wingert-8 Very solid, especially in the second half.
Nat Borchers-8 Along with the rest of the defense, came alive in the 2nd.
Jamison Olave-8 Nearly a 9, he was a beast all night.
Robbie Russell-8 Solid defensively and got an assist.
Kyle Beckerman-6 Decent but not spectacular.
Andy Williams-7 Nice assist, really came alive after it.
(Jean Alexandre 46)-6 A couple big tackles, not at all out of place.
Ned Grabavoy-4 Red card was harsh, but he got it and did nothing before it.
Raphael Cox-5 One too many turnovers, but I like his game and if he figures out how to play under control, look out!
(Fabian Espindola 72)-7 Nice energy off the bench and a huge save late.
Pablo Campos-7 Inconsistent, but put away his best chance and that's what you ask for.
(Robbie Findley 56)-6 Not great offensively but contributed well to the team defensive strategy.
Clint Mathis-7 Nice game for Cleetus.

Coach grade (Kreis)-9 Yes, RSL got a lot of help from some atrocious KC finishing, but his adjustments at half and the subs all seemed to work and RSL earned a very unlikely road win.

Ref grade (Geiger)-4 Harsh red card combined with amazingly inconsistent calls earns him a low grade.

RSL MAN OF THE MATCH - Chris Seitz
Earned his first shutout (and I do mean earned) by combining with the defense to hold the Wiz (That's funny! Read it again and you'll get it).

Douchebag of the Day - Davy Arnaud
A bit too whiny for my taste. Shut your pie hole and play some ball!

2009 Game 15: Toronto FC vs. RSL: Where has this team been?

I finally got out to my first game this season (with a little help from KALL's $7 ticket promotion), but I couldn't have picked a better one to go to. RSL put together one of its more complete games of the year in taking apart a Toronto team that came in on short rest.

RSL controlled the flow of this game, for the most part, and after going up 2-0, kept Toronto from ever really looking dangerous. Yura put together one of his best outings of the year and we had a nice cameo by Ian Joy late. Overall, some solid play by the home squad, and a good, and necessary, win.

First half grade: A-
A good first half but not spectacular. The second half saw a few players step it up (most notably Ned Grabavoy) and really lead RSL to the finish. Two goals, but the defense was not perfect and Toronto had a few chances.
Second half grade: A
Nicely done by RSL in the second, scoring the final goal, but more importantly, shutting down the Toronto attack completely.
Game grade: A
A good, solid win at home. Hopefully RSL can build on this without getting the big heads that killed the team after the 6-0 thrashing of the NERds.

Player grades:
Nick Rimando-7 Didn't have a lot to do, but made the saves when necessary.
Chris Wingert-6 Also didn't have a lot to do, but the attacks never seemed to come from his side.
Nat Borchers-6 Passing was iffy at times, but got the job done.
Robbie Russell-7 Nice job filling in for Olave.
Tony Beltran-6 Poor first half, but redeemed himself with a solid 2nd.
(Ian Joy 83)-6 Nice to see Ian back on the field.
Kyle Beckerman-6 Almost a 5, scored a goal, but missed 2 or 3 absolute sitters.
(Tino Nunez 91+)-NA Didn't have enough time for a true rating.
Ned Grabavoy-7 Bad first half, but astounding in the 2nd. Nice assist on the 3rd score.
Javier Morales-6 OK game, nothing too great.
(Andy Williams 75)-6 Nice to see Andy getting some run.
Clint Mathis-7 Hard to argue a goal and an assist.
Yura Movsisyan-7 Nice, composed finish on the goal (for once). Very active, but had a bad case of ballhogacitis.
Fabian Espindola-4 The only weak link on the night. Just awful. Absolutely no effort and zero movement off the ball. Probably could have had 2 goals if he'd followed up on some plays.

Coach grade (Kreis)-7 I'd have started Andy over Ned, but Ned proved me wrong on that one in the 2nd. A 3-0 win is hard to criticize, but I'm still shocked Espi got a full 90 with that sort of (non-)effort.
Ref grade (Jurisevic)-5 The usual inconsistent MLS ref effort.

RSL Man of the Match: Yura Movsisyan
Yes, he made some mistakes, but got himself into good spaces and looked good on the goal.

Douchebag of the Day: Amado Guevara
After his teammate delivered a late, crushing tackle and picked up an obvious yellow, what does Guevara do? Complain for about 5 minutes. Seriously, it was one of the easiest yellow calls you'll ever see and Guevara whined like someone had punched his mother. Grow up, dude.

And now, some low-quality pictures from last night's game courtesy of my crappy camera phone:
Setting up the formation on a goal kick.


For those who haven't yet seen it, the unfortunate aftermath of the Supporter's end stage debacle


And now, a series I like to call, simply, "Sunset Over Rio Tinto"


Mathis sends in a cross as the sun sets




And then, the sunset truly hits...

AGAIN

So we've been having computer issues at the ol' homestead once again, meaning I am way WAY behind on everything Review related. I'm going to try and get the site back up to date as soon as possible, but we're a ways out I think. In the meantime, here's my player grades from the latest last minute RSL meltdown...

RSL vs. Houston Grades:
Nick Rimando-8 Saved a (questionable) PK, played well.
Tony Beltran-4 Attacks constantly came from his side, gave way too much space for the tying cross
Nat Borchers-6 Played well until falling asleep on the goal
Jamison Olave-3 Horrific. Played the lazy, careless game he can be known for, then gets tossed for dissent. Well done.
Chris Wingert-6 Meh.
Kyle Beckerman-5 Also asleep at the wheel on the goal.
Will Johnson-6 Active, but not especially useful
Javier Morales-6 Too much time diving, but ok otherwise
Clint Mathis-6 OK but needs to do more
(Tino Nunez 76)-6 Not really given a chance, came in with RSL a man down
Yura Movsisyan-5 Nice on the assist but otherwise useless. Needs to learn to win something in the air (and put a shot on frame and....)
(Ned Grabavoy 82)-6 Not a lot of time to do much.
Fabian Espindola-6 Solid goal, some good effort at times, but needs to impose himself on the game more.
(Robbie Russell 63)-6 Decent in trying to hold off the Houston onslaught.

Coach grade (Kreis)-6 New formation seems to suit team, needs to get Olave a crowbar to help him remove his head from his ass.
Ref grade (Maruffo)-3 Another MLS game that devolved into UFC-lite. Cards were also a bit one-sided and the PK call was a bit weak for my tastes. Plus, a 2 minute water break in the middle of the game? Really?

RSL Man of the Match: Nick Rimando
Singlehandedly kept his team in the game. Earned RSL 1 point as opposed to 0.

Douchebag of the Day: Jamison Olave
You should never, ever, EVER be dumb enough to pick up two straight cards for dissent like that. Dude, take a xanax and back away...

2009 Game 6: RSL vs. Crapids: Rocky Mountain Cry

Wow. What a turd. Will RSL ever win a road game? 8-ball says: Signs point to no. Since we are already to the midweek game, no use for a full review. Here's the grades from the game:

Player grades:
Nick Rimando-6 Decent until the injury
(Kyle Reynish 35)-6 Left out to dry on the goal, solid debut
Robbie Russell-4 An abomination of a 1st half, only slightly better in the 2nd
Nat Borchers-6 Stopped most attacks going his way
Jamison Olave-5 Bad call or no, got to be more careful than he was on the red card
Chris Wingert-5 Very up and down
Clint Mathis-6 Still played decent even completely out of position
(Tony Beltran 74)-6 Quiet in garbage time
Kyle Beckerman-6 Very bad at times, good at others, however, the only RSL player with enough passion on the night
Javier Morales-4 Terrible. Turnovers galore, poor free kicks, and a 1 game suspension (although I am tempted to give an extra point for elbowing Mastro, who generally deserves it)
Will Johnson-5 Just a thought, but I'd be curious what would happen with Will as a 2nd striker and a burner like Findley up top. I think that would make a good combo
Robbie Findley-6 Needs to be more aggressive shooting the ball, but ok
Yura Movsisyan-5 Still couldn't hit the broad side of a barn from 6 inches
(Ned Grabavoy 66)-5 Mostly useless.

Coach grade (Kreis)-6 After going a man down, there wasn't a lot he could do
Ref grade (Jurisevic)-3 Most ordinary calls were ok, but the big calls were all missed. The straight red on Olave? Terrible. Morales's elbow on Mastro? Missed it. The obvious pick-up of a pass back by Pickens in the 3rd minute? The one that would have changed the whole complexion of the game for RSL? The easiest call he'd have all year? Didn't make it. Shockingly bad.

RSL Man of the Match-Kyle Beckerman
Did Kyle play the prettiest game for RSL? Did he play the most technical game? Was he even the best player on the field for RSL for much of the game? No, no, and no. But Kyle did something that few of his teammates wanted to do: hustle. He wanted that game. He wanted the RMC. And yes, he tried a bit too hard to make something happen at times, but at least he tried. If, say, Javi had put in that kind of effort maybe the scoreline would have been different. On a related note, Javier Morales gets an honorable mention for MOTM, not for his play, but for decking Pablo Mastroeni. Well done!

Douchebag of the Day-Pablo Mastroeni
Was his normal whiny, crying, dirty-playing, douchy self. Honestly, perhaps we could just change this to the 'Pablo M. Award'

2009 Game 5: NERds vs. RSL: El Beatdown Grande

I'm hoping to do an actual review but right now I'm too tired and out of it to do a full one now. Here's the grades from the big 6-0 shellacking:

First half grade: B+
RSL in control most of the half, but couldn't hit the back of the net.
Second half grade: A+
All that needs to be said: SIX goals in 36 minutes.
Game grade: A+
Once again, and even though it was against a New England B (or possibly C) team, it was 6 to 0. Period.

Player grades:
Nick Rimando-6 First shutout and didn't have to do much for it
Robbie Russell-7 Got forward well
Nat Borchers-7 As always, a steady force in the back
Jamison Olave-8 Showed again why he is the starter and not W(H)orst. Got a goal to boot
Chris Wingert-6 Meh for Chris
Will Johnson-6 Very up and down, got it together in the 2nd half
Clint Mathis-8 Huge game for Clint and a possible Goal of the Year candidate
(Andy Williams 74)-7 Nice free kick goal for Andy. I'd like to see more of him, but who do you take out for him?
Kyle Beckerman-8 Played really well, controlled the midfield. Defending was brilliant
Javier Morales-7 Weak game until he started getting the corners locked in
(Ned Grabavoy 68)-7 Seems to always give some spark off the bench
Robbie Findley-7 Solid game for Robbie
Yura Movsisyan-6 FINALLY got a goal, but again missed easy ones including a 1v1 that a corpse could have scored on that he put right to the keeper
(Luis Miguel Escalada 72)-7 Showed a little of why J&G decided to keep him

Coaching grade (Kreis)-9 First half was meh, but whatever he did at halftime helped! Plus, all the subs contributed.
Ref grade (Toledo?)-6 I still think Findley should've gotten a PK late in the 1st half, but other than that, nothing was too egregious.

RSL Man of the Match: Clint Mathis
Brilliant game. Even without the goal and assist, he had a very nice game. Add those in and it's an easy call.

Douchebag of the Day is taking a week off out of respect for the NERds. They just got beat 6-0, no reason to add insult to injury.

2009 Game 4: RSL @ Energy Bovines: Total collapse

Wow. What a turd RSL laid out all over Giants Stadium last night. They were beaten in every facet of the game by a New York team that had not scored a goal of their own volition all season (their one score coming off an own goal). Apparently all that improvement we keep hearing about hasn't hit yet. The strikers couldn't finish, the midfield couldn't pass, the defense couldn't, well, much of anything. Poor all around. Basically, vintage RSL, and if you've been a fan for any length of time, you know how bad that is.

First half grade: F
From the whistle, NY took control, when David Worst (no, not a typo), in for Olave (for reasons I don't totally get) was outmuscled by Dane Richards who put the ball into the box. Rimando got a finger to it, but it defelcted straight to Kandji who pasted it into the open net. 1-0, 1:30 in. Yes, you read that right, Worst, at 6-4 and 210, was pushed around by the 5-7 and 153 lb. Richards. Yes, he sucks. The bovines kept control for most of the half as RSL feebly sent long ball after long ball skipping across the artificial turf and out of bounds. Blah. 1-0 Energy Bovines.

Second half grade: F
Basically see the first half with the following changes: 1) Worst was now beaten by Angel rather than Richards and 2) Jeremy Hall receives a straight red in the 66th, giving RSL the man advantage. But judging by RSL's play, you wouldn;t have noticed the difference if you hadn't been told.

Game grade: F
Once again, RSL loses 2-0 to a team that had not scored all season (4 games). They look horrible while doing so.

Player grades:
Nick Rimando-5 Made some great stops, but probably could have done better on the goals.
Chris Wingert-5 Not Chris's best.
Nat Borchers-7 Got beat a little on the second goal, but otherwise was tremendous.
Robbie Russell-5 Too quiet.
David (W)Horst-3 Just awful. We are screwed if this is our "depth". Perhaps he'd be better suited for Ogden?
(Luis Miguel Escalada 65)-5 Bad. Did nothing in 25 min.
Clint Mathis-6 Did a lot of running, Not a ton else.
(Ned Grabavoy 82)-6 Made a nice penetrating run, but didn't have time for much else.
Kyle Beckerman-7 All over the midfield. Another nice game for Kyle.
Javier Morales-5 Not one good free kick all night, too much diving.
Will Johnson-6 Up and down, evens to about average.
Robbie Findley-5 First touch was bad.
(Andy Williams 78)-5 WAY too many turnovers for 12 minutes.
Yura Movsisyan-5 I'm sorry, I don't get the Yura love. HE CAN'T FINISH. Another bad game.

Coaching grade (Kreis)-3 Late scratch of Olave was baffling. Did nothing to fire up or organize the team.
Ref grade (R. Salazar)-3 Allowed way too much pushing off (see the first NY goal), cards were all soft. Just awful all around.

RSL Man of the Match: Nat Borchers
Perhaps slightly at fault on the Angel goal, but was basically defending for 4 as he got no help. The only defender, and only player outside of Beckerman and maybe Grabavoy, that looked sure of himself or composed. Without his play, RSL loses 6-0.

Douchebag of the Day (aka Assclown of the Match, I like the alliteration DotD provides): Dane Richards
Did it all. From pushing off defenders all over the field (and getting away with it with help from the awful Ricardo Salazar) to flopping at the slightest touch, Dane was King Douche all night long.

Pros:
+No one got hurt.

Cons:
-David Horst didn't get hurt (JOKING! I don't wish injury on anyone, regardless of how bad they suck).
-David Horst proved once again that he is terrible.
-Thoroughly outplayed by a bad NY team, now without RSL killer Van Den Bergh.
-Is Olave hurt?
-Yura still can't finish. We need a real striker.
-Escalada was also terrible, giving us 3 poor forwards.
-The fact that RSL really couldn't even mount a serious challenge with a man advantage.
-The lack of fire from RSL for much of the game.
-The entire game.

What we learned:
1) RSL still can't play on the road (2 games, 2 shutout losses).
2) The Energy Bovines will still be RSL kryptonite, even without DVB.
3) Once Espi gets to town, Yura should find a nice comfy spot on the bench (won't happen, but should).

2009 Game 3: DCU vs. RSL: Ben Cup: Round 1, FIGHT!

(Sorry for the Street Fighter reference in the title, couldn't help myself.)
Anyway, I had planned a big review of the big Ben Cup match but a busy (and strange) week kinda pushed all that to the side. In its stead, a mini-review, starting with some sweet, sweet player grades:

Player grades:
Nick Rimando-6 Not a lot to do, left out to dry a bit on the goal.
Tony Beltran-6 Not spectacular by any means, but serviceable.
(Raphael Cox 59)-6 Too many turnovers, but I LOVE this guy's hustle. Getting on my favorites list very quickly.
Nat Borchers-7 Pretty solid in the back, stymied most DCU attacks that came his way.
Jamison Olave-7 Caught defending no one on the goal, but scored one of his own to atone.
Chris Wingert-6 An average Chris Wingert day.
Clint Mathis-6 Didn't get involved as much as he had in the previous 2.
(Ned Grabavoy 74)-6 Providing some nice depth in midfield.
Kyle Beckerman-7 Best game of 2009 so far, got involved and nearly scored.
Javier Morales-7 Quiet, but came up with a HUGE goal out of nowhere for the win.
Will Johnson-6 Similar to Wingert and Beltran, not great by any means, but solid.
Robbie Findley-5 2 of the quietest assists you'll see. Got beat a few times by Jakovic.
(Andy Williams 89)-6 Very little time, hard to grade, but gets an average 6 for not doing anything wrong.
Yura Movsisyan-5 WAY too selfish; decision making is not there.

Coach grade (Kreis)-6 There were some minor adjustments I'd liked to have seen, but overall, ok.
Ref grade (Stott)-4 Not for any egregiously unfair calls, but for his seeming confusion on whether he was reffing for MLS or WWE. A little too physical for a soccer match.

RSL Man of the Match: Kyle Beckerman
Tough one to call as no one stood out. Olave blew it with poor defense on the DC goal. Javi was close but only seemed to play about 25 out of the 90 minutes. Becks wins it with a solid, full-90 effort.

Assclown of the Match: Mother Nature
Another cold, rainy, miserable day for an RSL match? Why of course! And this week, with RSL on the road? Mid-60s and sunny in Sandy, what else?

Pros:
+RSL is on the verge on winning the Ben Cup yet again.
+Late game winning goal for Javi was a beauty and may provide him with a spark.
+Kyle returned to his proper form.
+RSL was able to answer back quickly after an opponent's goal.
+Did I mention that RSL now has the upper hand in the Ben Cup?

Cons:
-The strikers again looked fairly lost for much of the game (like in Seattle).
-Yura's decision making never seems to improve.
-Until the goal, Javi seemed absent for much of the match.
-DCU always seems to kill us at RFK. Can RSL buck the trend to keep the Cup?
-The weather again messes with a home game. C'mon, it's supposed to be spring dammit!

What we learned:
1) RSL can beat DCU, even when they play their first-string keeper.
2) Will Johnson continues to look good on set pieces, giving the reds another option besides just Javi.
3) RSL may finally have the resiliency needed to carry on after getting behind, rather than throwing in the towel.

Game grade: B
It wasn't pretty, and it certainly wasn't RSL's best effort. But the team recovered from being outplayed at home for much of the first half to deliver a nice come from behind win. Let's make it 3 in a row this week boys!

2009 Game 2: Crew vs. RSL: Beatdown Supreme

Hmmm... So was game 1 just an "Invasion of the Body Snatchers" situation or something? Because this looked like a completely different team out there this week. RSL looked energetic, they pushed the action, and, most importantly, finished some chances. Hopefully RSL can build on this one and go on a *gasp* early season winning streak!

First half grade: B+
RSL certainly started off with a bang, when about 1:30 in, Will Johnson hit a blistering free kick from about 30 yards that Will Hesmer just parried away. The ball dropped right to Robbie Findley who put it away for an early 1-0 lead. I like the move of letting someone other than Javi take a kick every now and then, and it certainly showed it can pay dividends here. Columbus seemed to take control soon after, culminating in a Jason Garey goal in the 22nd on a classic RSL scrambling-nonsense defensive play. Momentum swung back to RSL 7 minutes later when Columbus keeper Hesmer inexplicably kicked a clearance directly into Robbie Findley at the top of the box. Findley collected the ball, calmly ran around Hesmer, and neatly tucked the ball away. 2-1 RSL. RSL played fairly strongly the rest of the half and took that lead into halftime.

Second half grade: A+
Wow. RSL basically laid 45 minutes of complete domination down on Columbus this half, and it showed with RSL scoring 2 more (and if Yura could finish, it would have been about 4 more). In the 62nd, Yura and Robbie proved that they CAN work as a unit with Yura taking a ball out wide left of the box and playing a gorgeous cross in to Robbie in the box. Findley then hit an equally gorgeous header into the bottom left corner of the goal. 3-1. Just five minutes later, Kyle Beckerman opened his scoring account for the season, rifling a header (off a Mathis corner) past Hesmer and into the net for a 4-1 lead. Findley was then pulled soon after, to a standing ovation from the home fans, or else I'm convinced he would have gotten a 4th. RSL nearly struck again a few times, but the Columbus D held for the last 20 minutes and RSL won going away, 4-1.

Full game grade: A
A very VERY solid home opener for the reds, which hopefully portends good things to come. Even with Columbus missing Hejduk, they still are a good team, last year's champions, and RSL took it to them. Well done.

Positional Grades:
Defense: B-
Midfield: A
Forwards: A-

Player Grades:
Nick Rimando-6 Caught a bit out of position on the goal, but otherwise made good decisions.
Tony Beltran-6 MUCH improved over last week's disaster.
Nat Borchers-7 Solid in the back.
Jamison Olave-6 Made some big plays, but showed his careless/lazy side quite a bit in that first half.
Chris Wingert-6 Struggled at times, but overall ok.
Clint Mathis-8 Another stellar game from Clint. Where was this last year (and in 05)?
(Ned Grabavoy 75)-6 Did well in limited time, should have an assist, but Yura was busy at Grand Suck-tral Station.
Kyle Beckerman-7 One of KB's better games in a while. Maybe he should go on ESPN.com more often?
Javier Morales-6 Quiet game but made the plays when needed.
(Jean Alexandre 85)-6 Didn't have a lot of time, but looked energetic.
Will Johnson-7 The early free kick (that led to the RF goal) was a doozy.
Robbie Findley-9 Made the most of his chances and was rewarded with RSL's first hat trick! Awesome!
(Andy Williams 70)-6 Decent in a brief stint.
Yura Movsisyan-5 Bonus point for the assist, but he has got to work on his finishing. He missed another 2 or 3 this game that a drunk monkey would've scored on.

Coach grade (Kreis)-7 Kept his team on the attack and with the right mentality. Nice to see RSL not let up, even with a 3 goal lead.
Ref grade (Prus)-7 RR whipping boy Alex Prus apparently got some contacts or something. Certainly wasn't perfect (although for him it may have been), but a decent job all around.

RSL Man of the Match-Robbie Findley
Gee...that was a tough decision...

Assclown of the Match-Alex Prus
For making me eat my words (see the Ref grade section). The bastard.

Pros:
+Robbie Findley comes alive.
+Is Clint for real? Finally?
+RSL gets a nice win over a solid team.

Cons:
-Weather, increased ticket prices, poor marketing, a Thursday game, and some community apathy lead to a horribly small crowd.
-Yura still can't finish, even the easy ones.

What we learned:
1) RSL may just be a team to be reckoned with after all.
2) Columbus needs Hejduk to have a chance.
3) Luis Miguel Escalada may not be with the team much longer. I know he is coming off and injury and was listed as questionable, but it's a bit surprising Jason didn't give him even 5 or 10 minutes of garbage time late.

And now, up next for RSL: The beauty, the pageantry, the wonder...The Ben Cup 2009. Kicking off April 11th in Sandy, UT! YES!

2009 Game 1: Wait, who is the expansion team?

Wow. After all that talk about how the players now knew the system and how much better RSL was going to be this year, they went up to Seattle and laid a complete egg against the expansion Sounders in losing 2-0. If you didn't know better, you'd have thought RSL was the expansion team and Seattle was a 2008 playoff team. Ugly stuff to start the year as RSL continues to prove they can't play on the road.

First half grade: D+
Seattle obviously still had a boost from the crowd and the newness of it all and they came out and took it to RSL. Beltran was continuously abused down the flank and finally paid for it when Zakuani faked him out of his shoes and put a pass to an unguarded (thanks Nat) Nate Jaqua for a goal your blind great-grandmother could have scored. 1-0 at half.
Second half grade: F
RSL needed to come out in the second half and put their stamp on the game and really take control. Instead, they continued to fling long ball after long ball upfield to no one in particular. Kreis then inexplicably (and therefore about the norm for him) took out Findley for Williams, who a) showed he shouldn't be playing as a forward, and b) should've come in for Yura if he's going to play as a forward as Yura had an atrocious game. Soon after, Fredy Montero sealed it with a long range strike that seemed to take Nick off guard. 2-0 Seattle, and from that point on, RSL seemed to give up with the exception of late sub Raphael Cox who became easily RSL's best player on the field late.
Full Game Grade: F
RSL certainly looked like a team playing its first game of the season. They also looked like a team that struggles on the road. And for much of the match they looked like a U-14 squad. Ugly.

Positional grades:
Defense: B-
Midfield: F
Forward: D+

Player Grades:
Nick Rimando-6 Played well, but loses a point for the Montero goal.
Tony Beltran-3 Awful. Burned for the first goal and couldn't complete a pass.
(Raphael Cox 84)-7 Was the best player on the field after coming on.
Jamison Olave-8 Without the big O, RSL loses 5-0.
Chris Wingert-5 Shaky stuff from Chris.
Nat Borchers-5 Takes partial responsibility on both goals.
Kyle Beckerman-4 Too many late, swiping tackle attempts. Easily could've gotten a red.
Javier Morales-4 Poor first touch, terrible corners. Never put himself in the game.
Clint Mathis-7 Beautiful vision. Probably his best game since coming back.
(Jean Alexandre 89)-6 Not much time to do anything.
Will Johnson-6 Very up and down all night.
Robbie Findley-6 Good passing and took the few opportunities he got.
(Andy Williams 74)-5 Looked lost out there, needs to impose himself on the game.
Yura Movsisyan-4 Almost a 3. Blew about 3 golden opportunities, gets way too cute with the ball and turns it over too much.

Ref grade (B. Toledo)-5
Not good, but certainly not into Alex Prus territory. Some uneven calls and some very soft yellows.
Coach grade (Kreis)-4
Didn't seem to know what to do once RSL got behind. Did nothing to turn the tide at the half.

RSL Man of the Match-Jamison Olave
Made numerous big plays in the back. The one black mark was the stupid yellow he picked up on a needless shove on Montero.

Assclown of the Match-Dan Sheldon
It was nearly Montero for his whining all game (and for putting the nail in the coffin), but it goes to Sheldon for his sparse, monotone "play-by-play". If you are calling the game and getting completely shown up by the color guy, it's time to find a new profession. Is this really the best channel 2 can do? Can we get Bill Riley back in there, please? Hell, I can do a better job and I'll do it for much less than they're paying Sheldon, I'm sure.

And now for a new segment to the Review, it's time for "What We Learned":
1) RSL (and Chivas TST) were completely shafted when they came into the league. They shared an expansion draft and the Superdraft. Meanwhile, Seattle signs players from its USL team and then gets the expansion and Superdraft picks to itself. What a joke.
2) RSL seems to have come into the season a bit overconfident. Hopefully this result will humble them a bit.
3) Jason Kreis has a looooooong way to go before he can compete with the likes of Sigi Schmid in the coaching department.
4) RSL STILL cannot play on the road, and now apparently can't play on turf anymore either.